I just cut my nipple shaving
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
