Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
