and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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