Are we in a gay sports bar?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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