so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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