I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
