She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
