Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
