Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
