the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
