he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Randomize
