Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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