There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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