lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
