So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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