is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
