You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
These tits shall not be calmed
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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