just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
