I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
its not stalking. its research.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize