he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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