Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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