dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
