So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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