I'm really into asian looking animals
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize