I have demons in me.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
