i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
