Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
