Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I think your dad took our porno
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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