Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
