i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
