I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
