Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
