Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
