He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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