There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
