She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
