so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
