The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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