So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
