just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
