K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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