Christians are straight up FREAKS
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
