i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
