we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
