i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
