I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
