Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I cut my penus on the lid.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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