Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
