Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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