My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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